You know those defining life moments, where you just feel your whole core shift? I had one, two years ago.
And it happened because of one question that I asked myself. This one question changed my life. Wanna know what it was?
Good, cause I'm gonna tell you.
But first, I'm gonna tell you about Gabby Bernstein, an amazing metaphysical teacher and author, who has helped transform the lives of so many through her meditations, yoga practice, and healing words.
She held an empowering workshop that I attended via live stream. And in this workshop, she asked the audience to meditate while listening to a Kundalini mantra called "Ek Ong Kar Sat Gur Prasad." The mantra was set to music and sung by the most talented Jap Hari Kaur (if you don't know what kundalini or any of this means, don't worry because it's not really the point. lol!).
Before Gabby began the meditation, she cautioned her audience, stating that this was a "magic mantra" that was believed to manifest whatever was in the mind of the meditator and the time of meditation.
Basically, if you're gonna do this exercise, don't think about shitty stuff, because whatever you think about WILL HAPPEN!
I sat down on the floor, grabbed Parker (who was 18 months at the time), held her close, and closed my eyes.
The music began, and I felt my body melt into the beautiful voice, and the warmth of my precious baby.
And then I heard a voice in my head.
AHA! I knew you were waiting for that part where I go all wacky woo-woo on you!
I mean, it was definitely my voice, but it also wasn't... if that makes sense.
But it asked an important question. It asked...
How do you WANT to feel?
That was it. Pretty simple question.
And I immediately knew that I was to decide how I wanted to feel about my life.
Okay, perhaps it wasn't such a simple question.
But the answer was obvious.
I want to feel at peace. I want to feel complete love.
What happened next was astounding.
That very feeling. Peace. Complete Love.
It just washed over me. Sitting on the floor of my living room, with Gabby guiding the meditation live on my computer screen.
I felt warmth wash over my heart, and I pulled Parker closer to me, smelled her skin, felt her heartbeat next to mine. Every molecule in my body relaxed, and I just sat there with her, in that moment, in total and complete peace. In total and complete love.
That moment, that feeling, two years ago, has guided every decision I've made in my life since.
I left a job that drained me.
I started creating boundaries with people who were draining me.
I started focusing on the people and the activities that I love, that fills me up.
I began making offers to help women find peace, empowerment, and love.
And I started a business that is literally blowing my mind.
The possibilities that I am creating for myself, for my children, are limitless.
Today, I am the deliberate creator of my emotional state. I do this by choosing, with intention, the thoughts I want to have about the circumstances of my life.
No, I do not always feel love and peace. I feel shitty about fifty percent of the time (because that's just life, my friend).
But when I feel the shit, I know that I am feeling this way because of how I'm choosing to think about a particular situation.
No more abdicating my emotions to other people. Only I control my emotional state. And that is the most empowering news ever.
I always get to decide how I want to feel. In every situation. No matter what.
This one, simple moment in time, gave me an understanding of what is possible for me in my life.
And today I am living that possibility.